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in a web of glass, pinned to the edges of vision


I'd forgotten how often we saw Magritte

mucha mosaic


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Ignorance is not intent.
Asking to learn is not affront.
Offended is not entitled.

This vocabulary lesson brought to you courtesy of a few folks.
  • I'm inclined to think ignorance is sometimes a defense. For example: 'I AM SO MAD AT YOU FOR MAKING THAT INSENSITIVE COMMENT ABOUT PEOPLE WITH HEMOPHILIA MY BROTHER DIED OF HEMOPHILIA AND YOU ARE OFFENDING THE FUCK OUTTA ME' is reasonably answered with 'Oh god, I'm so sorry- I had no idea about your brother,' surely?
  • Particularly if the offended party is a stranger who has somehow appeared in your living room.
    • How about an acquaintance you didn't even know had a brother?
      • Let me preface this by saying I don't live up to my own standard here.

        In the case you've presented, the insensitive comment was still insensitive, and thus should not have been uttered. Of course, if we didn't say anything that might offend someone, then we'd never say anything at all.

        This goes to the point of when a politician says something like "If I offended hemophiliacs, I apologize to them." It ignores the larger point of the fact that he thinks hemophiliacs are bloody fools (pun completely intended).

        That said, yeah, I'm certainly not going to call you out on any specific statement. Glass houses, stones, etc.
        • Oh, I'd wanna know if something I said rubbed wrong. What gets me cranky is the assumption that I deliberately set out to rub someone wrong.
          Really? I got better stuff to do than seek to piss someone off. There is important True Blood fanfiction to read!
    • Yeah, exactly.
    • People never seem to apply "Never attribute to malice what you can attribute to stupidity (or ignorance)" to these cases. It is a bit tricky to do so while offended, but it is polite.

      Mind you, polite is another of those things that people don't seem to go for these days.
      • Yeah- malice is the typical assumed motive, which... yeah, I'm such a malicious person. ;)

        And politesse is so very nearly a dead field. :/
  • Well to my view that would still be slappable - because we shouldn't decide that offensive things should only be said when the offendee is not in the room. If people are indulging in anti-gay speech when they think only straight people are around, it's not ok.

    I think ignorance is a defence if:

    1) It's reasonable ignorance. If, however, someone is claiming ignorance that doesn't pass the smell test then no

    2) They acknowledge that they have offended people (not, "i'm sorry you're offended")

    3) they are willing to learn and cure said ignorance
    • Fair point, really.
      Thinking about it, a better way to phrase what I was thinking about would be answering rage regarding hemophilia with 'oh-- you know, I hadn't considered that would be an awful thing to say. I'll avoid that in the future- thank you'.
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