Per 
ahkond's comment, I add that these questions were originally coined by Marcel Proust, though they were popularized by French talk-show host Bernard Pivot, host of "Apostrophe" and "Bouillon de Cultures". (you're being paraphrased, old bean: Lipton credits Proust and Pivot now, as above).
1.What is your favorite word?
Schadenfreude: (from the german 'Schaden' (damage) + 'freude' (joy)): that pleasure garnered from witnessing the travails of others. I like the word less because I really seek out the suffering of my fellows to mock- and more because I just find it fascinating that there is a word for it.
2.What is your least favorite word?
No.
3.What turns you on, excites you or what is your favorite thing?
Language, novelty, but most especially, other people's enthusiasm.
4.What turns you off?
Disenfranchisement.
5.What sound or noise do you love?
The happiness of friends: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
6.What sound or noise do you hate?
The happiness of strangers: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
7.What is your favorite curse word?
...I have to pick just one? Probably fucking: I use this modifier a lot when I'm really swearing up a storm. 'Fucking imbecile', 'fucking shithead', 'fucking moron', 'fucking fucker's fuck', and so forth.
8.What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Novelist, cultural agent provocateur.
9.What profession would you not like to do?
Food and public service would have to be involved.
10.If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
'We've saved you a table over here, away from the fundamentalists.'
ahkond's comment, I add that these questions were originally coined by Marcel Proust, though they were popularized by French talk-show host Bernard Pivot, host of "Apostrophe" and "Bouillon de Cultures". (you're being paraphrased, old bean: Lipton credits Proust and Pivot now, as above).1.What is your favorite word?
Schadenfreude: (from the german 'Schaden' (damage) + 'freude' (joy)): that pleasure garnered from witnessing the travails of others. I like the word less because I really seek out the suffering of my fellows to mock- and more because I just find it fascinating that there is a word for it.
2.What is your least favorite word?
No.
3.What turns you on, excites you or what is your favorite thing?
Language, novelty, but most especially, other people's enthusiasm.
4.What turns you off?
Disenfranchisement.
5.What sound or noise do you love?
The happiness of friends: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
6.What sound or noise do you hate?
The happiness of strangers: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
7.What is your favorite curse word?
...I have to pick just one? Probably fucking: I use this modifier a lot when I'm really swearing up a storm. 'Fucking imbecile', 'fucking shithead', 'fucking moron', 'fucking fucker's fuck', and so forth.
8.What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Novelist, cultural agent provocateur.
9.What profession would you not like to do?
Food and public service would have to be involved.
10.If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
'We've saved you a table over here, away from the fundamentalists.'
My answers:
1.What is your favorite word?
charming
2.What is your least favorite word?
"like", when used as a conjunction or filler
3.What turns you on, excites you or what is your favorite thing?
Competence
4.What turns you off?
Lack of consideration
5.What sound or noise do you love?
rain on eaves
6.What sound or noise do you hate?
the internal combustion engine
7.What is your favorite curse word?
If we mean "favorite" as in most used, that would be "dammit", but my most treasured curse word is "apeshit", as in "oh man he went APESHIT".
8.What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Drummer
9.What profession would you not like to do?
Waiting tables. I'd go stark raving nuts in short order.
10.If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
Can I count it off, fellas? Can I count it off? ONE TWO THREE HIT ME
'Amusing.' It's a euphemism for 'telling,' particularly when the data it references is an immense bombshell which no one takes any notice of. ("I find it amusing that much of Iraq's dual-use equipment was supplied by the corporation run by our vice-president.")
2.What is your least favorite word?
'Should,' as in "You should be [...]," "It should be done like this," "Everything in the world is as it should be."
3.What turns you on, excites you or what is your favorite thing?
Suggestions of the downfall of mankind. Being worshipped is good, too.
4.What turns you off?
Humanity's deception, hypocrisy, and inhumanity to itself... seeing people be awful to each other. Also, when the wrapper on the cheese stick rips before it's completely open.
5.What sound or noise do you love?
Bass-level feedback.
6.What sound or noise do you hate?
The sound my toilet makes.
7.What is your favorite curse word?
I've been using 'assbag' a lot lately, and variations thereof. ('ass basket', 'shitbucket,' 'cockbag,' etc.)
8.What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Anything where I can get away with just a g-string and boots.
9.What profession would you not like to do?
Mall toilet scrubber, Toys 'R Us employee, White House press secretary.
10.If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
'Welp... you're going back. You didn't cause nearly enough trouble.'