1.What is your favorite word?
Schadenfreude: (from the german 'Schaden' (damage) + 'freude' (joy)): that pleasure garnered from witnessing the travails of others. I like the word less because I really seek out the suffering of my fellows to mock- and more because I just find it fascinating that there is a word for it.
2.What is your least favorite word?
3.What turns you on, excites you or what is your favorite thing?
Language, novelty, but most especially, other people's enthusiasm.
4.What turns you off?
5.What sound or noise do you love?
The happiness of friends: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
6.What sound or noise do you hate?
The happiness of strangers: their laughing, giggling, yelling excitedly.
7.What is your favorite curse word?
...I have to pick just one? Probably fucking: I use this modifier a lot when I'm really swearing up a storm. 'Fucking imbecile', 'fucking shithead', 'fucking moron', 'fucking fucker's fuck', and so forth.
8.What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
Novelist, cultural agent provocateur.
9.What profession would you not like to do?
Food and public service would have to be involved.
10.If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the pearly gates?
'We've saved you a table over here, away from the fundamentalists.'