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in a web of glass, pinned to the edges of vision

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, over.

I'd forgotten how often we saw Magritte

mucha mosaic

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, over.

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gayer than the gayest gay that ever gaye
So I got home today with the Fancay New Cabinet Hardware.

I cannot put the pulls on the drawers yet- the drawers have holes for a 4" wide pull in them, and these are 3" pulls.

I wrestled like mad with the doors to the over-counter cabinets and tried to put the new knobs in those cabinets into the holes where the pulls were. No dice- the holes are too deep for the merely-1" long screws. But there were these OTHER holes, drilled into the cabinet doors, right near the ball-and-socket clasps that held them, and I figured I'd use those...
...who the fuck thinks it's smart to drill holes for a knob that are almost 1" offset from each other?

None of the holes that're bored out wide enough to take these screws is any of the six holes that had a handle in it before. For some obscure reason it made sense to drill A SET OF SIX NEW HOLES rather than to keep two of the three (these two are actually even with each other). Oh my heavens no. In fact, whoever put in the prior handles used WOODSCREWS to do this, sinking the woodscrew into the plastic of the handle. Jesus fucking christ how pathetically daft.

I need to acquire a drill or borrow someone's. This is absurdist. Two of these holes are properly together- and one's down there. What the fuck.
Annoyingly, this means yes, I have to paint the whole damn kitchen. Fie. Granted, the kitchen needed a solid coat of paint that wasn't stained to parchment-beige from smoking and from cooking. but still, fie.

Though damn, but the pulls and knobs that I've put up look sweet.
Pity that the designs on the light globe are only OK-looking- and COME OFF IN CHUNKS WHEN YOU FUCKING WASH THE GODDAMN LIGHT GLOBE.
n.b.: I use this icon because fuck, I'm so goddamned gay.
  • And gay means happy, and happy means gay! So behold, Gay Noodle Boy:
    • I put the knobs with the 'mouth' as above on top. JUST to avoid that association. Curse you.
    • Good thing I noticed it first, then, yes? ;)
    • And EW about the designs on the light globe! I guess my preference of the blank version was justified.
      • yeah. They put them on crooked, too. (sigh) $20 that was not well spent, those represent.
        • Return the damned thing. It's a reasonable expectation to be able to clean it without it falling apart.
    • Upside-down, the pulls have pi/stonehenge on them.

      I have a drill, but it's all the way down here in San Jose.
  • Wow. That icon is so gay, I can't...I can't...argh, I can't even vaguely begin to focus on what your post was about.
    I want a, like, real life LCD screen button with that GIF to wear around. People would be hypnotized in to doing my bidding.

    ASS POWER!
  • ...my condolences. We have a heavy old-fashioned not-cordless drill which you can borrow; we have a reasonable selection of drill bits, too.

    ...And I am indeed hypnotized by the disco ball butts.
  • Ugh, ugh, and ugh. I am so sorry. The photo of the globe was gorgeous -- it's utterly wrong that they did a crap job producing it.

    Suggestion: for kitchen painting purposes, find and use the KILLZ primer. This stuff impressed me to death, and it's an excellent stainblocker. It's really easy to build up stains in the kitchen, and they can come through whatever you end up painting even if you've cleaned well before painting, resulting in a need to repaint. It's an extra step that's worth the effort. (Being in a plaster house in very humid DE, we have to use it on every wall and ceiling surface we're painting, for reference.)
  • OMG, colubra is SO teh gay. Not "some gay" or "a gay", but "TEH gay". Teh Platonic Ideal of teh gay.
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