When we split up I went over to the Castro and bought a saucer for the plant to sit in. Then I bought a chichi scented candle (LIME AND BERGAMOT, for the love of pete!), then to the coffee shop for pretentious expensive coffee. Then home...
...where a bit of online shopping has finally made it such that my kitchen shall be making its first steps to being so art deco that Frank Lloyd Wright will rise from the grave and say 'OH FOR THE LOVE OF JESUS STOP IT'.
That first step will be a new light globe for the ceiling:
I suspect I need to just accept that heterosexuality ain't happening anywhere within 30 miles of me, and get on with my life.