in a web of glass, pinned to the edges of vision

Goddamned high-end management fucktarded gits.

colubra

1/14/05 12:12 pm

I never.
NEVER.
NEVER
ever need to see again the following phrase:

'agility to customer needs'.

IT HAS NO MEANING. I DO NOT CARE IF YOU ARE MY GREAT-GREAT-GRANDBOSS. COMPOSE IN FUCKING ENGLISH.

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• feyandstrange

  1/14/05 08:31 pm (UTC)

  I bet it would have more meaning in interpretive dance. I'd like to see the Beeg Bosses provide interpretive dance versions of their memos.

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• sinick

  1/14/05 08:42 pm (UTC)

  

  As opposed to fucked English, yes.
  
  In other words, it'd be nice if all those Micro.Brained.Asshole. grads out there would stop doing to the language what they'd like to do to the world. Sans lube.

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  • colubra

    1/14/05 08:50 pm (UTC)

    

    Yeah. I suspect that the reason that the messages that they send out need new words used more and more incorrectly is that they haven't said anything new since 1960.

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    • sinick

      1/14/05 10:23 pm (UTC)

      

      On the line of Links You Never Wanted To See:
      
      The MBA Jargon Watch
      
      Buzzword Bingo
      
      Some Three Word Generators
      
      And, just as a reminder that MBAsshats aren't the only culprits, a
      Postmodernist Essay Generator
      
      

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• kaninchenzero

  1/14/05 09:01 pm (UTC)

  

  The bidnessspeak coinages make my teeth itch. 'Proactive' is a battle long since lost, alas. Yes, I know that it's supposed to be the opposite of 'reactive.' But there's a perfectly good work meaning the opposite of reactive. Active. Blithering idiots.
  
  If they didn't have a super-cool highly technical jargon, people might think they didn't really warrant those super-cool salaries and severance/retirement packages. And that's just not a world I want to live in.
  
  Personally, I think it's poorly-concealed envy of science geeks, who have a super-cool highly technical jargon.
  
  Off topic, may I steal your icon? It's beautiful.

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  • seismic

    1/14/05 10:26 pm (UTC)

    

    Personally, I think it's poorly-concealed envy of science geeks, who have a super-cool highly technical jargon.
    
    I have successfully played Bullshit Bingo (Bingo for which the cards are covered in business buzzwords). Everyone in the room had some sort of scientific background and they had still succumbed. The combination of the actual technical terms and the nonsense business buzzwords was truly awesome (and somewhat painful) to behold.

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  • colubra

    1/14/05 10:35 pm (UTC)

    

    please do steal- I stole.

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• cubes

  1/14/05 09:42 pm (UTC)

  

  I used the word 'synergistic' in a document yesterday. And meant it.

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  • sinick

    1/14/05 10:08 pm (UTC)

    

    There is no hope for you.

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    • colubra

      1/14/05 10:24 pm (UTC)

      

      eeh, I'm OK with this one. What alternative would you use for 'relating to or possessing synergy', then?

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      • sinick

        1/14/05 10:32 pm (UTC)

        

        Depends on what, exactly, you mean by synergy. :)

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        • colubra

          1/14/05 10:38 pm (UTC)

          

          The interaction between two or more forces or agents such that the combined effect is greater than the mere sum of individual effects, of course. The word doesn't mean something other than that!

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• aaronthemad

  1/16/05 03:55 am (UTC)

  

  Yeah, I'm pretty sure customer needs is a roll against charisma or wisdow, not agility.

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  • colubra

    1/16/05 04:09 am (UTC)

    

    WINNER.

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  • :)

    racaille

    1/16/05 09:45 am (UTC)

    That's exactly what I was thinking!

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• safran

  1/16/05 11:32 pm (UTC)

  

  Hey Colubra! Are you writing articles under a pseudonym?
  This is right on topic; buzzword overkill. You'll love it.
  
  http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story&ncid=738&e=1&u=/ap/20050116/ap_on_hi_te/buzzword_overkill

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