'I'm drunk. This means I will abjectly fail at any effort to express myself rationally. This means I will also abjectly fail at any attempt to explain away any abject failure at expressing myself rationally. I should instead say 'wow. I'm drunk.' and go forth under the assumption that- like all drunk people- I am a drunken fucktard.'
I offer this advice as a person who vomited all over himself while trying to hit on somebody, and then was drunk enough to be surprised that this person was uninterested in his bile-scented self. I, too, have been a drunken moron. And I have found it is far smarter to decide 'I am a drunken moron' than 'I had a point in all that, and I'm going to try to salvage it'.