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in a web of glass, pinned to the edges of vision

not-so-guity not-so-secret

I'd forgotten how often we saw Magritte

mucha mosaic

not-so-guity not-so-secret

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mucha mosaic
I love what weddings represent, I'm thrilled to death for friends who get married and who are chasing the dream of living happily ever after.
I enjoy people. I enjoy excuses to get dressed up.

I hate weddings.
  • Same here. Weird, huh? I love so many things about weddings, yet I just can't stand 'em.
  • So what is it about them that you don't like?
  • Most weddings are ritual; see nihilistic_kid's recent post on ritual for some good stuff on the social forces involved. One person's (or couple's) ritual is not necessarily another's, however, so I would repeat the question someone posted above: what don't you like in particular?
    • Basically, it's all the opportunities for the worst to boil up in folks. People make the ceremony into something that's Got To Be Just So, and drive each other up the wall.
    • That certainly can happen, but isn't a necessity, of course. :)

      My wedding, for instance, was fairly lax while still being somewhat traditional, and looking back on it now there are things I'd still do differently, but it was okay.

      Items:

      - My mother pointedly refused to make any decisions or indeed have any opinions about ANYTHING, because her mother had been too heavy-handed when she wanted to get married, and she wound up eloping (and her mother didn't attend, even when invited). I had to pester her several times when I did want actual input.
      - I did the whole white dress thing, because I wanted to, but only had one bridesmaid and likewise we only had one best man. My sister was the flowergirl, but we had no ringbearer. Basically as simple as you can get it and still have a procession more than 2 people long.
      - I emphatically hate "Here Comes the Bride", so picked different music, over my mom's one objection. Nyah.
      - While we used more or less traditional vows, I did remove the "does anyone object" part, because I think that's braindead and stupid. We did not write our own gushy boring vows.
      - We invited everyone we could think of, and told them they could wear whatever. After short ceremony, we had the reception immediately after, where we all ate cake and opened presents in total chaos.
      - Photographer? Ha! Snapshots provided by various relatives. I wanted to eat cake.
      - Family-and-older-people-not-invited party elsewhere, after reception, after changing back into jeans.

      No dancing, no huge bouquets of flowers, no 2-hour-plus ceremony goop, just the basic basics. Not quite as stripped-down as my sister-in-law's wedding in a cyberchapel in Vegas (ahhh, vegas), but pretty close.
    • as something of an insider on this one, i have to say i was thrilled at how much of that there was not.

      that said, i still understand how you might feel that way about weddings, even the lower-key ones.
  • I don't care how muh you loathe them. If you don't come to mine I will hunt you down. :)
  • if you've never had a JOB that involved weddings, consider yourself thankful

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